Hi Christopher, it sounds like you are having completely normal feelings about this. You are doing the right thing by checking yourself to. We have to go through the process which includes an emotional rollercoaster ride. Then we reach down inside and pull out that strength and courage and do the deal. I understand the feelings you have about your finances as well. Some say work and deal with it, and some say not too. For me the bottom line was my health. Physical, mental and spiritual health was far more important than worrying about finances. I think we have to try to find a reasonable and responsible balance. Like Shar said it is your choice. If I felt like I was having trouble I'd pack it in and go see my family. Good Luck