Keplan
I'm really sorry to meet you...here. I'd love to have made your acquantance under other circumstances, but as they say, when God hands you lemons, make lemonade.

As Dogman said, vent all you need to; we all understand. Been there, got the t-shirt as they say.
A recurrence is a shocker, and something we all dread. One the positive side, they really have come a very long way in 5 years. When I was diagnosed earlier this year, my ENT was very frank; he told me that had I presented the same cancer a decade ago, he would have sent me home to put my affairs in order.

Now, I'm cancer free, all through advancements made since your first encounter with this beast.

It won't be fun, but you already know that. If there is any questions you have, or anything you want to yell about, this is the place to do it.

Don't forget it's the Holidays though. Make time for your family and friends; they will all become so much more important to you in the coming months than you ever dreamed possible.

take care, and let us know when the treatment is scheduled to take place..and don't forget...
Happy Holidays
Wayne