Hello Caryn and welcome to the forum. When my husband, Tom, was going through this almost 3 years ago, his radiation doc gave him several things throughout treatment. The one that seemed to help the most was Aquaphor, which is available over the counter. It is a thick ointment, and very soothing. We also applied cool packs, not icepacks as they were too cold, but a cold washcloth eased some of his discomfort.

Tom also experienced what you and Brian are describing, and I can understand how that would be frightening. Are you able to eat OK and have you considered getting a PEG tube for the short term to give your throat a rest? You have definitely come to the right place here at the OCF for information and support. I'll keep you in my thoughts.
Charlotte