Welcome to OCF!

There is still so much more to learn about HPV! New things are being discovered all the time, including things about transmission in casual contact like shaking hands or picking it up from hard surfaces like countertops. One of the leading researchers Dr Maura Gillison has been affiliated with OCF for many years and has been the one who brought about much of what is known about HPV today. Yes, the HPV virus can lie dormant for decades before ever making the change from dormant to active. Then out of over 200 strains it would need to be one of only a few strains which cause cancer. Almost always its #16 that causes the most cancer and other medical problems, also the #18 and #10 strains can cause cancer in some patients but much less frequently as #16. To further complicate this... even if someone is tested for HPV and its found, that does NOT mean it will ever turn into anything serious. Only a very few of the previously mentioned strains change into cancer, but mostly it runs its course and then most people clear it from their bodies before it ever turns into anything serious. Off the top of my head, Im sorry but I do not know the exact figures for specific HPV strains to become cancerous, but it is very low odds.

Getting a cancer diagnosis is NOT easy for anyone. The patients entire world comes tumbling down crashing to the floor when they hear "you have cancer". Its also NOT easy for caregivers! Its sad your husband is looking to blame someone for his illness. Its all part of the grieving process that often comes along with being forced to face your own mortality when given a cancer diagnosis. Many patients find therapists very helpful in getting thru the rough times of a cancer diagnosis. Its just another tool that is for a temporary basis, ask if this is available where your husband is being treated. High anxiety is so common many cancer patients are taking meds to help manage their anxiety... caregivers too! Since many of the meds for anxiety take a while to work, its sometimes necessary to begin taking the meds weeks before the patient even gets their treatment plan set up.

Best thing you both can do for now is to focus on whats most important. Your husbands intake will eventually be temporarily compromised making it very difficult to eat and swallow, at least thats how most patients are going thru treatments. Every patient is different and will respond to things in their own unique manner so comparing to others doesnt usually work. Intake, especially fluids are vitally important to get at the very least 2500 calories and 48-64 oz of water... every single day!!! By starting to watch the intake now, hopefully your husband will eat all his favorites to avoid going into treatments with cravings. If he is on the slim side, gaining a few pounds would be a very good idea. No matter what his current weight is... zero weight loss is the goal and for many thats next to impossible.

Another helpful tips is when someone offers their assistance when told of your husbands cancer, take down all their contact info and tell them when the time comes they will be contacted. Theres a million things helpers can do to make this easier for you and your husband like taking out the trash, raking leaves, walking the dog, picking up prescriptions, making a dinner suitable for you both, driving your husband to treatments or appointments once in a while, watering plants, taking the car for inspection, doing laundry, picking up groceries, etc. All those things seem overly simple but those little things can be a gigantic help to make a major difference in your husbands life

Read thru posts here and on the main OCF site to help learn more about HPV and your husbands oral cancer (OC). By learning more about it, you will become a strong advocate for your patient. Just dont forget to take some time just for you once in a while too. Caregivers have a very difficult job!!! Be good to yourself to make sure you can be where you want to be for others.

Best wishes with everything!!!