One of our neighbors is a breast cancer survivor who recently completed her chemo.

She looks 10 years older than her age, moves real slowly and has trouble focusing.

Last month she was really in pain from peripheral neuropathy.

Despite these struggles, she took time out to come by and give me a hug and tell me it will all be ok.

We cried and talked and complained about the "bad luck" we got dealt.

It was nurturing.

Today. my sore throat is getting worse, headache, and earache too. Guess the tonsil tumor is getting agressive in there!!

Now my chest pain hass moved to right back side of my chest and I'm scared to death it's met'zd to my lungs.

Really wishing I'd had the surgery this last Weds. now. :-(

Oh, well...Maybe I needed to have this pain to appreciate the pain from the srugery more (LOL!)

The person who worries me most is Seth.

He is in denial still I think. I don't want to bring him down since we both need to really focus on keeping our business going, and I have been almost no help lately.

I feel paralized by this whole thing!

Usually he can count on me to handle every thing from big issues to the most minute detail. I know he is frustrated and that sometimes makes me upset because I think he isn't taking this seriously enough.

I know how damaging stress is when one has cancer, so I am really trying to ignore it, which upsets him more :-)

Seems petty in the scheme of things currently, but I KNOW I am going to need him more than ever before to have any hope of pulling through this.

Does anyone have any books, tapes, or other resources they could recommend that might help him deal with this?

I feel measurably better being able to discuss on this forum, and am trying to convince him to become involved too.

- Hugs to everyone...

Michael