Hello Fish - welcome to the family, you just joined a big one, one where all the members either have oral cancer or are caregiver to one who does. Your new brothers and sisters are very supportive, after all, we've stood in your shoes, we know what it's like.

You have a big journey ahead, one fraught with opportunities to be afraid of the present and the future. Most of that is fear of the unknown as before diagnosis you probably knew nothing about this new beast in your throat. But, we will get you past the unknown if you stick with us and read, read, read what is written here.

The other fear is worry about everything. Will the treatment be successful, will the cancer come back, will it hurt too much, for how long, will I be able to eat, to sleep, to talk. You will be told over and over on this forum that worry like that is counter-productive. It accomplishes nothing positive and lots of things negative ... it lets cancer win.

So, your "mission" is to get through this thing day by day, hour by hour if necessary. When the worry demons start knocking on your door you need to have a list of pleasant things to do on the inside of that door. Don't open the door, read the list instead, pick one, and most importantly, go do it, right then.

My list is long: go finish that Michael Crichton novel I'm working on, go work on building a new radio control model airplane, go fix one you've crashed, go watch a good movie (Youtube has lots of free movies to watch, check it out in the Friends Forum below). Go listen to some good music (also on Youtube - full concerts even, check out the two Phil Collins full concerts he did in Paris). One specifically for you, go clean out and organize your "fishing" tackle box. Go re-line that rod and reel, it probably needs it anyway. If you have the energy go wash the car, a clean car always makes me feel better. If you can't think of anything else just go outside and look at the stars at night or just enjoy the sunshine during the day. Try to locate the North star or Orion's Belt. Look for Venus at night and in the morning. A walk might be even nicer, you don't have to go far or go fast ... just go.

Long story short, the list is endless. Just don't sit there and worry about stuff.

Welcome to the family, Fish. Stick with us, we'll get you through this.

Tony