Hi Chris,
I think you're in the right place for support and help. I've found everyone here very helpful.

My son was 13 when his father passed away. I am sure that his mother's passing was difficult at best, especailly in light of having to change households and living arrangements. I also assume that this is and was difficult for you and your fiance; after all, she was the mother of your child; that bond is never broken. You will soon have the same bond with your fiance (congratulations!).

I'd like to suggest that you find a children's bereavement group in your area. I see your from New Jersey, so I did a general search and found many in the state. We were lucky to be living in a major metropolitan area at that time (since moved) and found a wonderful organization. They were mostly a children's bereavement group, but also support adults. The children were grouped by age and there were children there who had lost parents, grandparents, siblings, friends, etc in all different ways. I think that this helped the kids to see that even though there were different circumstances, that they could all help each other. My son was very reluctant to go at first, but later insisted that we keep going and he will tell you that he misses that group today. When he was in group, the adults went to their own group - they were usually broken down by spouse loss, parent loss, child loss, suicide loss, etc. Our organization was free, but did request that clients donate $50 if possible per 12 week session. There also groups out there for people with cancer and their families. This could also be beneficial. My son found the most benefit from the group discussion. He did have some private counseling sessions to work through a few things also.

Sorry for the long post, but I read your post and it broke my heart. I can partially understand. Please, reach out and accept help for you and your family. It's not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength.

Prayers for all of you,
Kat