Hey...I need to vent....how the heck did you get past the fear of recurrence? I get it together and then within half a day it has crept back in. I'm pretty sure Kev feels the same way but we don't talk about it and that's ok. He's back to work so I have 22 days to gather it together. It just seems like I keep hearing that BOT that went to lymph nodes leaves a bad prognosis. It went to the whole right side of his neck, but they did not remove ANY nodes. The MO said he didn't think he would need to have them removed with the regime of chemo and then the radiation they were going to hit him with.
It's stupid. I believe in God. I had full faith that Kevin would be healed during tx. So now I panic?? WTH???
I know, breathe. Logically, I know. Maybe I should start drinking!! I think what I'm feeling is normal, right???? How did you other caregivers get past it? We were actually doing really well until the recent PET false/positive. I think the way the docs responded made us realize that recurrence is truly a possibility where somehow we thought we were in the clear.
Thanks for listening!
Kathy