This is my first post. I am overwhelmed by the OCF �family� that has developed within this site and I feel privileged and blessed to be a part of it. I look forward to learning from those who preceded me in this process or going through it now. I also hope I can help by actively sharing my experience now and in the future.

My case in a nutshell is a diagnosis over the summer for SCC of the tonsillar fossa and base of tongue. It is stage III (I believe it is T1N2bM0) with relatively small mass/tumor around 1.75 cm, and three local lymph nodes involved. I had a tonsil and node biopsy today (Aug. 3, 2011) that will determine HPV or not. We assume it is HPV because I am a nonsmoker and moderate drinker. But I know HPV is not at all a certainty. It could be anything. I am age 56, 6�1� tall and weigh 187 with steady weight management for the past year or more. I am active and in overall good health.

There will be no surgery. Treatment is combination of radiation (x35 = 7 weeks) and Cisplatin every 3 weeks, scheduled to start Aug. 15. I am fortunate to be at one of the leading cancer hospitals in the US where all treatment is under one roof. The PEG tube is usually required if the person drops 10% or more of the start weight.

I have become more and more aware of the harshness of the radiation and I am grateful for all of the information at OCF. In addition to a great medical team I have wonderful support from my wife, co-workers, friends and church family. Especially my wife. We are committed to finding and implementing the best nutritional approach possible. It would be nice to avoid the PEG tube but we realize the greater, overall importance of finding the right combinations of food and fluids to get through the treatment phase and beyond.

My question today involves a dilemma created by the timing of the treatment. My son is getting married on Sept. 10 and my daughter on Oct. 15. Both are out of town weddings that will require some travel. The first wedding will not interfere with the daily radiation treatments. With a proposed chemo/radiation start date of Aug. 15, I will be at the end of week 4 for the first wedding and the end of week 9 for the second. It is possible the start date will move to Aug. 22, making it weeks 3 and 8.

My major concern is the October wedding, even though radiation will be complete. I am trying to determine if there is any reasonable chance that I will be able to make it and be functional at a very basic level (walk her down the aisle) at the Oct. 15 wedding at the end of weeks 8 or 9. My conclusion is that it would be almost impossible at the end of week 8 and very uncertain for the end of week 9. She and I are looking for a consensus that either points to �You are crazy to even think about it� or �You should have a fairly good shot at it.� How much would the PEG tube make a difference? It is a 2 hour nonstop flight, but too far to drive.

But I don�t want to have false hopes for the first one either. I realize the end of week 3 would be much better, particularly when factoring in the second round of chemo if it happens in week 4 (not sure yet how that works). I may not eat the same foods as everyone else, but I do hope to attend and host a rehearsal dinner and attend the wedding ceremony the next day, with a limited presence and role at the reception depending on what I can tolerate.

Sorry to be so chatty but this has been hanging over my head for the past few weeks as the timing came together for the treatment. I think I know the realities of the treatment and I am ready for it mentally, physically, and spiritually. But it breaks my heart to see it affect my children�s weddings. We all share the same ultimate priorities about my health. The main thing is to assure that I will be able to visit my children and my future grandchildren. Still, we are just trying to make informed decisions and are looking for insight from those of you who know from experience. I realize there are many of you who faced much tougher decisions with much higher stakes and I have not lost sight at all of how fortunate I am to have my family and a good medical prognosis.

Thank you for any suggestions and I look forward to contributing to the OCF forum.