Your activity may be helping your grieving process Liz - I hope so. People react differently under stress and in crisis - it doesn't mean that your reaction is any less valid than anyone elses. If fighting the doctors gives you purpose/satisfaction/justice/validation then I applaud you. But we do worry that it will be painful and we don't want you to hurt for any longer than you have to.

I am one to talk of course. I have fought with the doctors from day dot and was also told the records and reports were the property of the hospital. I cited the freedom of information act(I got that idea from the back of the cereal box) and lo and behold I was allowed to read Alex's file with a) written permission from Alex, b)on hospital grounds, c)in the presence of a health care professional (our cancer co-ordinator). Of course, I couldn't make head nor tail of most of it, but it gave me satisfaction.

I have learned that most people want to avoid confrontation and if you stand there with your hands on your hips looking like you know what you are talking about people will do what you ask. This is all after trying the "poor me, what am I to do?", Scarlett O'Hara act