You are not selfish Donna - and you know that. No one could have been a better care giver, but having said that everyone has their breaking point, and for you - this is it. I really think you need to sit down with your Mom and explain how you feel. She is a big girl now - responsible for her own actions, and while you remain ready to help - you cannot and will not condone or accept the current situation. Explain it to her just the way you did her. Your anger comes from your fear of loosing her. I am sure she will understand that.

There are many options for people who want to quit smoking - from Wellbutrin to patches to inhalers to cold turkey. Tell her to pick one and you will be there to hold her hand - so long as she is smoke free.

Good luck.

Donna (the "Other" Donna)

(Loved the use of "frack" - made me laugh out loud!)