Three months is a long time with an aggressive cancer.

I'm reading between the lines here but it sounds like you have a single doctor, perhaps an ENT or Oral Surgeon. The single most important piece of advice I can give you is to submit your case to a Comprehensive Cancer Center (Plenty of them in Calif).

Get yourself and your biopsy to one immediately. If you haven't had a biopsy yet that's a really bad sign!!

The difference is that a full team of cancer docs, surgeons, chemo, radiation, dental, etc., hold a weekly Tumor Board. They will examine your case and make recommendations. These CCCs see more cases in a year than a single doc might see in a lifetime. If their recommendations jibe with your doc, then good!

In my own case, my tongue tumor doubled in size in ten days! The trick to beating this disease is getting to it early and you can see from the responses above that we feel you are being delayed too long. Besides experience with cancer, the CCCs have plenty of experience with insurance companies!

http://www.oralcancerfoundation.org/resources/cancer_centers.htm