I'm not in treatment yet, but it's getting closer. I have been reading about the fatigue from treatment, and this is scaring me. I already suffer from chronic illness that saps my energy so much I had to retire early. I can barely get to doctor appointments now, even before therapy begins. So now I'm scared about what state I'll be in after therapy starts.

I don't have any friends near me to help me. So I've looked into hiring caregivers. But I'm not sure I can afford this for the whole treatment and recovery. My father offered to help, but he is 90 years old and has a heart problem and doesn't live close. I would feel just awful if the stress from helping me hurt him.

Anyway, I'm trying the best I can to find help. But I'm already exhausted and it's hard.

Andrew,
You really do need a caregiver. Perhaps you should consider calling the American Cancer Society in your local area and talk to someone about help...particularly later in treatment. I am sure they have helped people in the same situation as you and can suggest some resources.

Good luck and please don't try to tough this out by yourself...someone needs to watch over you particularly regarding nutrition and hydration.

Deb

Hi Andrew,

I know this is so difficult to deal with especially without a designated caregiver to lean on. Defintely contact the American Cancer Society for help. I have been exploring this as an option myself as a way to contribute and help others dealing with cancer.

What if you hired someone for just a few days a week to help you with errands and making meals to start out with and then take it form there? It may not be as expensive as you think.

You are in my thoughts. LOVE Kate

Hi Andrew,

Another option is to consult with the Social Work department at the hospital where you are being treated. They may be able to help you find some assistance and may have a list of volunteers who can help. Your doctor/team should be able to help you connect with the social workers if you aren't sure how to do this.

Also, if any of your friends or family ever says "just let me know what I can do to help" - they MEAN it! The problem is you are going to have to ask for specific help from them, but go ahead and do it. It will make them feel good to know that they can truly help out by driving you to appointments, making meals (if you are able to eat solid food), cleaning up your home, watching pets, whatever. Make a big list of all the things that would be helpful, and the next time someone asks "what can I do?" just hand them the list and ask them to pick something that would work for them.

Best of luck to you!

-Tricia

Thanks for the tips. I'll follow up on these.

Andrew - I know in our area in addition to all the great ideas above - several churches provide assistance. Even if you are not a member or an active attendee we have several churches here that provide money, meals, taxi service, house hold help, etc.

Don't be shy - ask EVERYBODY. There are tons of people in this world that really want to help people in a situation like you are dealing with. There's lots of crappy, cynical stuff going on in the world these days, but there are still good people out here!!

good luck to you

Bottom line is that the effects of the Tx are cumulative and will most likely take a huge tole on your body so please get assistance anyway you can.

All of the above -very good advice. I would add to it to try to plan for all of this ahead of time. Take out an equity line of credit on your home if you can. I gave my wife power of attorney so she could pay the bills. In addition to the well known fatigue side effects, the pain meds will cause your mind to be pretty well scrambled as well. You will need a caregiver - start lining up your neighbors, coworkers, friends, relatives, church groups. etc., now.

"There is nothing to fear but fear itself" - We've all been there - you can do this - one day at a time.

Andrew,

OK, this is bottom line. YOU will need some help!! I can not believe that you do not know someone that will be there for you.?

Right now you NEED Family, Friends, Neighbors that know you!! You will need big Support going through Treatment. You can also find support with Those that have gone through this. Check with the hospital for Volunteers!! Most of us that have gone thought this offer guidance for others.

Maybe someone here, may live close to you and can be of some help.

I am thinking of you... Hope this was of some help!!
Diane

Andrew, I can really relate to your situation. I took care of my husband for years due to his emphysema and he recently passed. Now I have been taking care of my Mother as she is legally blind, now I have been diagnosed with what appears to be cancer and don't have anyone to help me either. My mother is 81 and in better health than me. I am 55. I know that the hospital you go to will have very educated people in there to help you with every aspect of your aftercare. They will help you to get everything situated so don't worry and put all your energy into recovering. My thoughts are with you. Angel