It's been just over six weeks since surgery.

Dad went today to be fitted for his mask for radiation and to go through the simulation. During the visit they found a swollen lymph node on the left side (his cancer surgery was on the right side). He is scheduled for a biopsy Thursday, day after tomorrow. I

Take a deep breathe ... we have all been there , and you are right it isnt cancer until the biopsy says so. Easier said then done ..relaxing that is!

And I understand what you are saying about being realistic ..I want to know worst case scenario as well !!

Joy...what disturbing news! My heart goes out to both of you. I am hoping that this node is simply reacting to all of the insulting activity nearby. I presume that your dad's ND was on just one side.

Try to put yourself into "neutral." HAHA.....but try it....try not to allow thoughts into your mind that you can't do anything about. It is what it is, and your anxiety can't change it. Try to get very busy. Go to daytime movies....or get a trashy book to read....or make jelly.....or go to the zoo....wander in a flea market....drive in the country....go to the beach....make cookies.....just fill up the time somehow and realize that worrying will not accomplish anything. Don't worry now. You don't know what to worry about!! Try to make yourself go into neutral and push the anxious thoughts to some corner of your brain. Just try it.....for 30 minutes. Get busy with something totally un-related to this darn disease!

Joy--my diagnosis/treatment plan changed too! Plan 1 was total half of jaw/facial nerves removal for jaw tumour--'check' CT scan revealed primary is in lung---inoperable, incurable, palliative chemo to 'halt the course'.
So that's what I'm going with for as long as it's an option or until it ceases to work!

During the 'pre-biopsy' days, I was paralysed with fear---now I know that worry etc will make not a blind bit of difference to the outcome---so I go on doing the things I always did, around the treatment, and try not to think of 'a few more years if it works/6 months if it doesn't'

If worrying would change the treatment or the outcome, I would do it---as it is, I try and just manage the symptoms, keep the list of 'phone numbers for when I need them' handy, and see what each day brings.

The blender is ready for when I might be on liquids, the Will is made the partner and kids talked to about 'If..........'(not when!) and in the meantime I wake up each morning and get on with the day.

Nothing is easy about awaiting diagnosis, taking in treatment plans and percentages, going thro treatments, as all on this site will tell you--but to keep things in perspective, I just visit the supermarket sometimes specifically to just see the young, the old, the disabled, the families and think....Hmmmm...there's more to life than just me and my cancer.

There are a lot of very 'veteran' carers here who will give you so much support and strength, and a place to just vent when you need it!

Thinking of you and hoping for good news
Brenda

Thank you Sharlee, Colleen and Brenda for responding. I'm trying to stay positive. Colleen - keeping busy is NOT a problem....hahaha....I work full time, I'm taking 6 credits during the summer semester in college, I own my own home so I have plenty of house work and yard work to do and when I'm not cutting my grass I'm at Dad's house cutting his. His yard is much bigger than mine - it's an all day job there. After reading your suggestions I think I would like to make some time for that trashy novel...haha.

Tomorrow is the day. I just hope that we don't have to wait as long for the results from this biopsy as we did the first. At least we aren't waiting as long for the actual biopsy to take place. The waiting is torture. I'm praying for good news.

Thanks again for all your support.

Joy

Joy,

Waiting is a big part of having Cancer. You are always waiting for something. You will get use to it as time goes on. So we are here to wait with you., We are all praying it will be good news as well.

Take care,
Diane

Joy, Take care of yourself, make sure you get enough rest and know that we're all with you in praying that the biopsy will give you good news.

Nelie

Joy
We hope you received good news about your father. Please drop us a note when you have a chance and let us know how things went.
Prays,
Kim

No news yet. They did a needle biopsy and stuck him three times. He was a little anxious but was surprised when it was all over that it wasn't as bad as what he had expected. The actual RO did the biopsy and said he would call with the results. Dad's spirits are up. He actually went into town on his own today to run a few errands. I think he's trying to make the most of these next few days before radiation starts.

Thanks for caring.

Joy

It seems that a number of people come up with swollen lumps after their surgeries....I hope your dad's is just that...some sort of temporary tissue response. Keep us posted.