DaniO,
I'm so happy your mother is still with you. Her love and the time she spends with your daughter will, like my brothers, help shape the little one's future and make her who she is meant to be. I have to remember...those pieces the child will carry with them forever. My niece has my brother's love for adventure and seems to have very little fear of things - this is both good and bad! - but he lives on in her and she will be a strong adult because of it. Well, got to go know and clean up these tears and get ready for a party.
Thank you all, my friends,
Tonya

Hi Tonya,
I feel your grief and it seems like the pain is unbearable. My daughter just turned six too and my husband passed away on Thanksgiving last year of stage 4 tongue cancer. Parties and events will not seem normal for a while.
My husband's last party that he celebrated with us was my son's 3rd party in October. He was in a lot of pain and made an appearance for an hour, which I am so grateful he did.
Now he's in heaven celebrating with Jesus. For all the suffering he endured, I am so glad he is resting comfortably now.
I feel your pain and will forever speak out for early intervention of oral cancer.
Lisa

Thank you Lisa. All my best to you and your family.

Tonya,
Same to you. Your niece will be grateful that she stills has a caring Aunt and family who loves her very much. Keep close to her for your brother. You sound like a loving sister and aunt. God bless you and your family through your loss as well.
Lisa

Tonya,
I believe it is our obligation to keep the memory alive of those we love. Did you light a candle for her Dad? Or sit in a circle for 5 minutes and share stories of him with his daughter? It's important to help start some sort of ritual for your neice to remember her Dad. Afterall, if you teach her how to remember someone, she will know what to do when it is her turn to help others remember a loved one.
Also, remembering him will bring all of you a sense of comfort.
Eva

My question is morbid, but I feel the need to know.....Alisa and Tonya....you both have lost loved ones at a young age from oral cancer. My husband is 36 and was diagnosed with stage 4 tonsil cancer in Sept., I was 8 months pregnant with our first baby. I am very afraid of recurrence, etc. I want him to see Evan grow up and we get so upset when we talk of the future. It's always "this may be the last....I know that sounds aweful, but I guess it's human nature for him to feel that way. Not all times are sorrowful however, we laugh and goof off a great deal as well.

I guess my question is HOW did your loved ones ultimately succumb to this dreadful disease? I realize everyone is different, but my husband is so young and has never smoked. Your loved ones were as well. Is there any advice you can give me? Things to look out for? We have a follow-up June 25 and no mention of scans of any sort. I'm so uptight and worried all the time! Scared is more like it.

I wish you both the very best. My heart goes out to you and your families.

Ann

Ann, altho you addressed your post to specific people, I want to share something with you. None of us knows for sure which will be our last day on this earth, so living each day the best we can is a really smart thing to do. You and your husband have gotten a "wake-up call" to put into action the things that are most important to you both. Please don't ignore that call This humble advice is from a 65 yr. old grandma who wished she had figured this out a long time ago. Amy