amy,
I have just been diagnosed with scc, it was in my tonsils which they removed 8/4/06. But it has spread to my lymp nodes. Now I have to go thur chemo and radiation. I'm scared but I trust in God. I know how you feel you must do all the research cause I'm the same way. But take time to play a game, go for a walk, talk to somebody who can encourage you, read (not on your cancer), some good books are Spiritual faith, prayer books, ect. A great place to play games is on pogo.com... it's a great place lots of games. I'm just starting and I feel my life has been just turned upside down.. But I also have 3 children the youngest is 4. if they see my fear they will fear. So i spend alot of time doing things with them like painting, scrapbooking, and reading the bible. God Bless you all and your in my prayers.

Hey Amy,

I'm a psychologist: A happy-go-lucky guy if ever you saw one. I'm the last person I ever thought would start taking an antidepressant. I thought I could use my vast education to get me through anything.

Bottom line: I regret every painful day i didn't take Zoloft. I'm not ashamed of a damned thing, especially doing something that helps me not hate life. Heck, I'd wear a Zoloft t-shirt if I could get one.

Just one formally macho guy's experience. Your mileage may vary.

Teamshrink

Hi Amy, I had 2 horrible bouts of depression after my surgery. First about 3 weeks post and I was on an anti depressant. I couldnt go back to work and I cried all of the time. I swiched to another anti depressant and felt better after about 2 weeks.

Than about my 6th week of radiation I got so down again. I cried and slept all of the time. Although I was back at work, anything I tried to do was too much. My Rad Doc uped my med and about two weeks later I felt so much better. I believe that anti depressants do help people whose brain chemistry has gone aray for whatever reason. Please check into this as it may very well make you feel better.

Prayers,

Molly

To mwprincess1: Hi Marie. Guess I missed your other posts, so I need to say "HI" and tell you that your attitude sounds great and I really admire the time you are spending with your kids. I know that takes alot of your energy . Hang in there.
To TS and Molly[and anyone else who is interested] antidepressants are,indeed,a good thing and I would recommend you ask your immediate caregiver-if he\she is a spouse or close family member - if they might need to think about taking them also. We are all in the same fight. Amy

Amy, click onto this site. Remember, cancer doesnt have us, we have the cancer! This helps me sometimes when im feeling overwelmed about all this( www.thesurvivormovie.com )hope this helps you! God Bless You.

Hi. Thanks for all of the advice. I can't believe that it has already been 5+ months since I initially posted this question. I am doing much better now, and no longer have daily depression like in the beginning. I was surprised to see this thread active again - but glad everyone hear is so helpful. Thanks again.

Amy - Glad to hear you are feeling better. Knowing that you are better, I'll use this thread to scramble aboard my soapbox... (begin rant)

Diabetics are WEAK because they take insulin! Right? The big sissies. And blood pressure meds..HAH! What a joke - they are just WEAK to take those stupid pills. And how about the big babies that take thyroid meds??!! And then there's vitamins and aspirin and stuff...... Bunch of wimps. Pills are for wussies. Right?

Depression is a physiological / biochemical process in the body. If you don't expect diabetics to "just get over it", then don't expect people with depression to "just get over it" either!

Nancy Reagan was the famous face for the national "Just Say No" campaign against drugs back in the 80's. It was a ridiculous failure (not Nancy's fault). (now the joke part..) When the Reagans left the White House, Nancy did advocacy for National Depression Screening day - coining the slogan - "Just Cheer UP". More recently she is helping with the California coalition on homelessness - and the slogan is: "Just buy a house". Silly.

The National Council for Mental Health estimates that 55% of the country's population suffers depression that would benefit from medication. Anti-depressant meds do NOT make you feel better. They stablize your appetite, your sleep patterns and your ability to concentrate. That's it. Only the massively uninformed resist anti-depressant meds as a sign of weakness. (end rant)

Thanks for the space Amy. I feel better now!! Tom

I seem to be dealing with depression more than the cancer. Things that I have done, went to doctor put me on wellbutrine, I started riding bike, I went back to flying RC, tried to do alot of the old things I enjoyed found some I was unable to, became depressed with that. This web site has been good for finding new information, finding that your not alone is uplifting. For me this whole thing, from finding out you have it, what to do, pulling teeth, surgery, chemos, radiation, keeping up to the bills, wife left me, oldest boy got in trouble with the law, sister past away, this all since may 18 2005., has been a little much. I went to counseling with my wife, the guy said I was depressed all I could do was laugh at him. Things are getting better my wife and I are back together, the family is doing well. Im still somewhat depressed
but Im alive, able to spend time with my family.
Hope by sharing this with you will help anyone
get help for the depression, as soon as they can, or it can get out of hand.

I cannot emphaasize enough how important this issue is to head and neck cancer patients. A study just published shows a four times increase in suicides in our patient group. Don't let any of your loved ones or yourself believe that this can always just be fought through on your own. Get a professional involved. http://www.oralcancerfoundation.org/news/story.asp?newsId=1476

At a HNC conference I attended in May, a psychologist from Hopkins spoke on depression and mood. He was careful to distinquish between clinical depression and what he termed "being disheartened", the latter a more transient stage that is expected with any major life-changing event but which generally resolves on its own within a few weeks. He emphasized the importance of getting professional help and also, criticized doctors (including those of his own institution) for not taking this facet of treatment more seriously. Even by just asking the patient AND any caregivers about the patient's emotional state and then, offering help. Hopkins has a social support program but it is not part of the mainstream treatment -- that is, you are not given an automatic appointnment as you are with dentist, swallowing therapist etc. -- and you have to be proactive in seeking this help. (At least that was the case last year but I hear they have changed this).

One thing which can helps boost patient morale -- outside of professional assistance and/or needed medication -- is to try and plan for some enjoyable event after treatment ends. Not immediately, as you will not be feeling great for some weeks or months, but have something on the horizon. A trip, cruise, show etc. -- something you would have done as part of your "normal" pre-cancer life.

For example, we planned a birding trip to Mexico for three months after Barry's treatment ended. He had been very worried when first diagnosed, and after reading all the horror stories on the 'net about post-treatment disabities, that he would never be able to resume his major hobby of world travel & birding. We wanted to try and get out of that mindset and get "back to life." Barry spent a lot of time on the internet researching places to go in Mexico, making arrangements and, as a consequence, getting his mind off cancer. We invited a friend along as I thought Barry would get tired in the afternoon and would want to rest, and my friend Sally and I could go out birding together. Well, Barry didn't get tired (Sally did!) -- he was out all day and had a wonderful time -- and came back feeling like his old self and with the knowledge that he *could* resume his normal activities. This did a great deal to eliminate his "disheartened" mood and get him back to his usually happy self.

Gail