My dear... I raised hell with anyone who would listen! I contacted the newspaper, I called the ministry of health who usually governs this type of thing. I was told they were a privately owned facility and they did not fall under their jurisdiction so then I called the hospital that owned the facility only to find out that they didn't have a body to look into the care provided there. They owned it but it was run by a privately owned company so they were accountable to NO ONE but themselves.

I complained to some higher ups, I got some action but not enough. I complained to the drs. who worked there... they sympathized with the staff (the floor held upward of 50 patients and they had one nurse, one registered practical nurse (18 mos training - limited medical knowledge) And the rest were PSA - who wipe butts and feed the patients... medical assessments. didn't happen. Half the time the couldn't tell me what had happened with my dad during the day.

I complained to the outside psycho geriatric drs. and his assistant who came in. They agreed with me tried to give me advice and help but the staff blew them off as they had no real PULL there.

It was a frustrating three months my father went from an already underweight 156 (he was 6 foot) to 138lbs. 12 lbs of which he lost in two weeks. He weighed three lbs more than me and I'm 5'6 and a size 4. I asked them if a red flag goes up when a patient isn't eating, they said yes. Well I had to request his weight be taken they certainly didn't.

They let him slip into a diabetic coma and he almost died a week and a half before he actually did die. Had I not stopped by to feed him he would have been dead by 8pm that night.

There were so many incidences.

Negligence anyone?

I don't know, but they have everything covered, and it's hard to prove anything. They even falsify records, indicate things that are not true, and omit pertinent facts, incidents. I spoke with several lawyers with my severe reaction to induction chemo, some don't handle, and had to use contacts to see if anything was out of protocol, which I agree was not, somewhat, but not for not foreseeing problems with pre-conditions, and having had MRSA a few weeks before, such strong chemos should not have been used, but I'm still here, so that factors in. I didn't even see about a lawsuit from the hospitals and nursing home not treating my eye properly, which resulted in eye blindness, which may have resulted anyway, but never brought in an othomologist, who could have given proper meds, surgery, and the pressure wounds (bed sores) that took 3 years to heal, but again, I'm still hete with their lifesaving concern, Hosp, nursing homes just leaves you or dead. I asked for rehab, PT, and the nurse said, "Not on this floor, baby! None left the room, and a SS doctor told me I was on the floor, usually no one leaves lol. Anytime I went to or from each facility they all wanted to take a photo of your buttocks lol, not to show fault on their part.

My brother called the state on a NJ or NY nursing home for another brother, who have to investigate any accusations, but they sort of wash their hands of it, but get back to you.

Not all nursing homes are the same. The unit that my dad was in under hospice was wonderful. The wound care specialist treated the weeping in his lower leg so effectively his last days were comfortable ... and he was under a DNR.

My father in law is in a memory care home, and has been doing well for over two years.

I know that our family is very lucky in this.

Maria