So surgery is scheduled for Monday. I am so nervous. Partial tongue reconstruction and rightneck dissection. Trach. Then probably radiation after that.

Those who have had tongue reconstruction, how did your recovery go? Neck dissection? I have been having problems sleeping and eating because of the worry. Thanks so much.

Best of luck with your surgery! I can't say anything that will help you to stop worrying, I don't know if anyone can. But trust that your doctors are going to do their best, and you will be OK.

Where are you having the surgery? Do you have someone to help you through recovery?

Will be thinking of you and sending positivity your way on Monday.

Curly, I know its not easy to wait for a major life changing surgery. Try to keep yourself busy so you can keep your mind off things. The "what if" worrying is always the hardest thing to get past. I found when I concentrate on something else like reading a book (now my kindle), I cant give in to worrying. My mind can only deal with one problem at a time and by throwing myself into what Im reading will do the trick for me. Try doing some exercises a few hours before its bedtime. Going for a long walk or if you are fit enough, a run will help to give you a reason to be tired. Just dont do it too close to bedtime or you will be all pumped up.

Its a skill I have learned to avoid being overly worried. It takes lots of practice so I dont get myself worked up and more upset by worrying. You can do this too. Just allow yourself 10 minutes to think about the surgery then make your mind switch channels to something more positive. When the "what ifs" come creeping back, go do something that will distract you from thinking about it. Anything that takes concentration will help get your mind off your troubles. If I can do this, I know you can too!!!!

Take a dry erase board with you to the hospital. Some places have internet so you can even take a portable laptop or better yet, have someone bring these items to you. Do your very best to eat all your favorite foods now. Eating will be difficult until you relearn how to do it properly after the surgery. So for now go out and get all your favorites and leave no stone unturned. Say yes! to that piece of cheesecake or pizza. Make that your new little project to think up all the foods you love and make sure you have them before Monday.

Best wishes!!!!

Christine -- Love the "allowing yourself 10 mins to worry" trick! I'm gonna try to force myself to employ that.

Curly - The waiting and unknown is so hard! Thinking and praying for you -- hope all goes well Monday and with your recovery!!

He recovery is honestly not bad. I was eating by day 12 -it's actually easier than then radiation - the trache sucks big time- once you get past that you'll heal quickly hopefully.

I agree that waiting is the worst. Then they take more tests to make you wait all over again. I agree with Christine about taking a laptop or dry erase board since you are having a trache. I had one for 6 months and it seemed like a life time. Once its gone its like a whole new freedom to help focus on healing from your radiation if you need to. Good luck with your surgery, I will keep you in my prayers.

Thanks so much. I got off pretty easy the first 2 times I had cancer. I just can't believe that 12 years later here I am. I have had a rough year - my mother died in April and and I had a failed fertility cycle (after years of failed fertility cycles and a few miscarriages) among other things. Thanks Cheryld for letting me know that about your recovery, that is good to hear. My mom had a trach for awhile so I know all too well about it. I guess if anything this is a wake up call to start taking care of myself after I get through all this. Waiting really is the worst. Thank you all again.

Curly - Waiting is definitely the worst but when you find yourself thinking about all the things that could go wrong, just try to make yourself a list of all the things that could go right. Write them down if you like. It really helps to keep busy. Take 10 slow, deep breaths and think only of the breaths going in and coming out. If your brain interrupts you with chatter, then start over until you can do 10 deep breaths without any interrupting thoughts. You know stress can affect your immune system and with the stress you've had lately with losing your mother and then the failed fertility cycles, it's no wonder you've had a hard time sleeping and eating. But it's very important to take care of your health. I know about failed fertility cycles. I had "secondary infertility" and it was 9 years between my first and my second pregnancy . Even with taking fertility pills for a year, it was only after I completed a strenuous Instructor's Swim Course that I got pregnant. So exercise is definitely a good stress reliever if you can manage it. You've had some really good suggestions in the posts above and there is every reason for everything to go just fine with your surgery on Monday. You can do this. And you have a lot of people here to help you through it so stay close and let us know what's happening and how you are feeling.

Curly, how did your surgery go on Monday??? Let us know how you are doing...