| Joined: Jun 2009 Posts: 64 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | OP Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Jun 2009 Posts: 64 | My husband has had some bad situations with anxiety and also depression. Is this normal? He has to sleep in his recliner - can't stand the bedroom, it has carpet and he says it makes him feel like he is closed in. We went to our cabin over the weekend we were only there about two hours and he couldn't breathe. I had to take him back home. Can anyone share their experience with me on this? Pat
Crgvr to Husband 55-yrs, surgery to remove cyst-diagnosed as SCC, 4/3/09 CT & Pet Scan showed more cancer in left lymph node and primary at the base of the tongue.TX Radiation 7 weeks 5 days a week last day is 6/25/09 Chemo completed 6/19/09 Peg Tube 5/22/09
| | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 | I think he is suffering the depression phrase of this OC. It hits at different times for all of us it seems from what I read in the posts. You will suffer the most with this if it is ,, good luck and bear with him.
Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April. --- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
| | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 | Pat,
A lot of patients suffered with varying degrees of depression from barely noticeable to that requiring professional assistance and it sounds like your husband falls in that latter category. Since most of us hate going to a "regular" doctor you may need to get help from his cancer docs to persuade him to get the mental help it sounds like he needs.
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
| | | | Joined: Oct 2007 Posts: 104 Senior Member (100+ posts) | Senior Member (100+ posts) Joined: Oct 2007 Posts: 104 | Hi Pat My husband suffered from a deep depression towards the end of his treatment and in the months following. It was very frightening for him with feelings of being smothered, or rotting from the inside, vivid frightening hallucinations and other feelings he could not describe to me. Many times I had to stay with him and hold him over the bad spells. He was put on anti-depressants but it took 3 tries until we found the one that worked best for him. While he remained depressed the medication did relieve the dark scary parts. Do encourage your husband to seek help with his depression. It takes anti-depressant medication about 2 weeks or more to reach its peak effectiveness and sometimes one has to try more than one to find one that works for that individual.
Caregiver to husband Dx. Stage 4 SCC of gingiva with 3 nodes pos. Partial mandiblectomy with bone graft from iliac crest Dec. 2006. IMRT x30, Cisplatin x3. Completed Tx. March 15, 2007. Osteonecrosis & removal of graft & plate Oct. 2007. Recurrence of SCC Dec. 2007. Deceased Jan. 17, 2008.
| | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 | Pat, Im sorry to hear of your husbands struggles. Life after cancer isnt easy. the treatments are brutal and have long lasting effects. Many patients experience terrible after effects. All of this can build up and make a patient depressed. Even the fear of a recurrance is something that alot of us worry about constantly.
Talk to his doctors together about this. Im sure they will be able to help. Best of luck with your husbands continued recovery. Dont forget to still take some time for yourself. ChristineSCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44 2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07 -65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr Clear PET 1/08 4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I surg 4/16/08 clr marg 215 HBO dives 3/09 teeth out, trismus 7/2/09 recur, Stg IV 8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy 3wks medicly inducd coma 2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit PICC line IV antibx 8 mo 10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg OC 3x in 3 years very happy to be alive | | | | Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 46 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 46 | Hi Pat, I'm sorry to hear your husband is suffering in this way. Is there a social worker at the clinic where he gets treatment. If so, I'd encourage you to contact him/her and see what they have to offer. Sometimes some brief counseling is enough to get someone through a cancer-related bout of depression like this. And if need be the social worker can do an evaluation and refer your husband to someone who can prescribe anti-depressant medication if it is thought that would be helpful. This is a fairly common occurence and there are lots of options that can help, so hopefully he will find some relief. Best to you both!
CG to spouse, tonsillar SCC, T2N0M0, tonsillectomy 9/06, 35 rad tx finished 12/06, no chemo. Positive PET 3/07 in tonsillar fossa (residual tumor), surgery 4/2/07 composite resection tonsillar fossa and BOT w/forearm graft and right ND.
| | | | Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,844 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,844 | Pat,
During treatment I didn't have issues with depression really...I didn't like being left alone, especially during or right after extended hospital stays. After treatment, after the realization of the long term effects/damage of my cancer and treatment is when depression set its hooks in me. I took an antidepressant for a few months to help me during the worst part of it and it really helped me out. I did have to learn and am learning to cope however as my face isn't coming back anytime soon and an antidepressant doesn't fix the underlying issues.
Good luck, Be Well
Eric
Young Frack, SCC T4N2M0, Cisplatin,35+ rads,ND, RT Mandiblectomy w fibular free flap, facial paralysis, "He who has a "why" to live can bear with almost any "how"." -Nietzche "WARNING" PG-13 due to Sarcasm & WAY too much attitude, interact at your own risk.
| | | | Joined: Jun 2009 Posts: 64 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | OP Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Jun 2009 Posts: 64 | My husband didn't want to go to the dr. He was out of his anxiety meds and when I called I asked them to require us to come in before they would give us another refill. I explained the situation to the nurse, she relayed to the dr. We had been out to the office to see the Surgeon a couple of weeks prior and she mentioned that he didn't act himself at that time. I knew that this was coming on, but thought it would subside. When we went to the dr. he said no to medications, he broke down in the drs. office and finally decided he would give them a try. So we started on Monday, they said we should see a difference in about 2 weeks if it's going to work. If not she will try something else. I know the drs. said life would not be the same again and now I realize this is true. We have been through some tough stuff the past two months that has changed our outlook on life. Thanks for the reponses Pat
Crgvr to Husband 55-yrs, surgery to remove cyst-diagnosed as SCC, 4/3/09 CT & Pet Scan showed more cancer in left lymph node and primary at the base of the tongue.TX Radiation 7 weeks 5 days a week last day is 6/25/09 Chemo completed 6/19/09 Peg Tube 5/22/09
| | | | Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 | Hi Pat,
What you are describing sounds like exactly what I went through and I really sympathize with you and your husband. I felt like I couldn't breathe for 2 months and I hated driving b/c I felt too closed in. I started taking Lexapro and seeing a therapist and that REALLY helped me. I am just so sorry to you are dealing with this now. It was so hard for me and my husband. The good news is I feel great now and my anxiety is under control and I feel like myself. I used some other tricks that were really helpful. If you are interested let me know and I'll send you a PM. I will be thinking about you...the emotional side of this is so hard.
Last edited by suzanne98; 08-05-2009 05:37 PM.
Suzanne *********** T1 SCC on right side of tongue Age 31...27 when diagnosed 4 partial glossectomies No chemo or radiation Biopsy on 2/2/10-Clear Surgery needed again...no later than April 2011 Loving life and just became a mother on 11/25/10 It's not what we CAN'T do..it's what we CAN do:)
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