Hi all,

we had had all sorts of good news after Joe's most recent round of chemo/rt/surgery this past spring. But bad news can't stay away. They thought he had an infection on his incision site, took a biopsy, cancer in soft tissue of the neck. Our doctors are telling us nothing can be done (seems a little early for them to say this since we haven't had the PET done yet).

I am trying to remain positive, at least until we see what the PET says, and we are thinking of trying to get into MD Anderson. But he says the pain is sort of in the back of his head and neck - I am so afraid. What if it is days, not weeks or months? He has this weird snore so now I feel like his airway is getting blocked.

What does the end look like? What on God's earth do I do with my boys? They are 3 and 5. I have already told them, but I am not sure I want them to see the ravages of the end, and then, I don't want them to miss even one second with their amazing dad.

my eyes are literally sore from crying.