Hi John- It's hard to get a balance between being over helpful and helpful enough. I have to remember that my husband is a grown man but I also have to remind him to get enough calories in and enough fluid. He is really good when it comes to maintaining his PEG and hygiene issues. It seems like the scheduling and paperwork are left up to me. I also have to remember that he wasn't all that talkative before the cancer and to also realize how hard it is for him to talk now. The worst part for me is to try and make plans for the future without upsetting him. It almost seems like he is just realizing now how serious his condition is so I try to spare him some of MY concerns. The best thing is just to be there and be patient. Something I've had to work at since I tend to be a type A personality. The OCF is really the best resource I have found for helpful information and really great people!
Sue