Michelle,

Hopefully your friend will step up to the plate, and soon! That has been one of the hardest things for Mary, to realize that some people she thought were her closest friends just disappeared into thin air. Or worse, offerred to help then didn't come through when she needed them.
It IS scarey to step up, you're not always sure you are saying the right thing or giving the right advice. It is hard to watch a friend go through all these treatments and the side effects and wonder "Will she make it?". I valued my friendship with Mary too much to disappear, and I never would have forgiven myself if I didn't help. My husband, whose father died of colon cancer years ago, said "just be there and LISTEN-you don't have to have all the answers". Hopefully your friend will feel the same way after she has a while to think about it.
And as I was reading Liz's comment above about people thinking it was "catchy", it did make me think about when children are aware of all this going on around them, they need some support as well. My 7 year old became pretty clingy after my friend was diagnosed, and when I asked if everything was okay he asked me if I could "catch" the cancer from Mary by being with her! Never even crossed my mind he would be thinking that.....
This is a wonderful place to vent, to get support, and to get honest, helpful answers to your questions and concerns. I hope it helps you as it has helped me.

Liz