Amy, I am sorry you think I would be a bad influence for your husband. I have always questioned ALL the answers in my life & will continue to do so. I do not mean to say I have the answers by any means, but there are always many more ways to get things done, if you you seek them out. I have always joked about the fact that it's easier to ask for forgiveness than asking for permission! This attitude has served me well in my life as well as my fight with cancer & figuring how do to adapt to my new life. It is my nature to overcome, to do things my way, to take charge. Optomism is the key to my happy life & well being. Alot of doctors do not have all the answers & have actually given me some bad advice, not all, but some. You do have to be your own patient advocate & take charge of your own treatment, do what feels right & not just accept the answers sometimes. Tom got it right I think. Use it or lose it. Keep swallowing or lose the ability to. A year and half ago I could not lift my right arm above my head to rinse my armpit in the shower from my neck dissection. I would walk my fingers up the shower wall until I felt it was high enough, everyday until I could do it without the finger walking thing. I could not reach across my desk & lift the stapler & now I can. The doctors kept telling me to take it easy & be patient & I just kept trying harder. They said I'd be out of work for a minimum of 1 year. I was back to work full time in 8 months & worked part time off & on throughout treatment. The mind is a powerfull tool & will do exactly what you tell it you can or can not do. It has been proven throughout human history. Half full or half empty. Where there's a will, there's a way. I'll get off my soap box. I am only trying to be inspiring. For me sometimes if I just hear that one little thing, it makes the difference between trying or not trying. My best to all. Erik