My 51 year old sister had surgery to remove and reconstruct 3/4 of her tongue, three weeks ago. She also received radiation in the hospital. Some in the lymph nodes. To you all, I'm sure I sound simple. I am just now realizing what we are into as a family. I've just committed to going to Woodstock, VT from Pewaukee, WI to care for my sister whom I have been estranged from for over a year, while she receives both radiation and chemo. I am 46 next week. Terrified of seeing my sister like this. Afraid I will let her down. I need to understand more what to expect, the worst, the best. I need to know how to help her. She talks all the time. Like cotton in her mouth. She gets upset and talks fast. She can't hardly swallow a thing. Her tongue is very swollen. She is getting just a little bit of water down, once a day. She had suicidal thoughts, but has now gotten some more medication for this. She starts her rounds of radiation and chemo on 6/22. I arrive on 7/3. My elderly parents will be going there from Ooltewah, GA to take the first two weeks of treatment. My sister is married to a man 30 years her senion, 81. He is still the town constable in Woodstock, still caries his gun ! That worries us ! But, he is not of much help. This has crumbled him. She can't worry about him. So... I haven't gotten to read your stories completely yet, bits and pieces. I apologize if I am being selfish and only thinking and talking about my situation. This came on so fast, we were so unprepared, and now we are in URGENT mode. I needed help. So I'm here ... I will appreciate any word or thought. Thank you.