Thank you all so much. I tend to "stay away" when I'm down and last nite I did not and I'm so glad. It felt really good to get that out and I appreciate all the support. Sometimes I feel like if I share or think too much it beccomes so raw and makes me face all that I fear. Thanks again everyone.

Stage IV scc base of tongue/larynx
Total glossectomy/partial laryngectomy/radical neck dissection 4/05 followed by chemo and rad. Tonsillar Non-Hodgkin's lymphoma 1996(cured and not related)