Hi,
waiting, and worrying, and wondering is awful. That is one reason why caregivers have such a tough time.

My advice is to take it one day at a time. Ask lots of questions and be prepared to mention problems to the medical team.

I had 1/2 my tongue removed 4 months ago and finished radiation a month ago (I am 41). The radiation was not as bad as I expected - I think the doctors prepared me for the worst. If your mom has had 2/3 of her tongue removed already she has put up with quite a bit; if she can do that she can do the radiation! I found counting down the days or weeks helped - it really is great to know that the chemo or radiation is not forever, and to keep telling yourself just X more days/weeks, etc.

Your mom has a greater helper on her team - you! Both of you should be thankful that you have each other to go through this with. My husband did a great job of coming with me to all the medical appointments; it was so helpful to have his company, have him asking questions, etc. Especially on days when I felt sick or could not speak well due to loss of tongue,etc. Caregivers worry alot but you all do a wonderful job just by being there for us!

I was able to drive myself through 5 1/2 weeks of radiation treatment. The last 2 weeks are tough, as are the first 10 days after treatment ends, but it is great to start feeling better, more energy, easier time eating, swallowing, etc.

I just got thru it figuring I could take it day by day and that seemed to work. I also try to focus on what I have to be thankful for. Things like thank goodness we found the cancer and it is being treating, being thankful for my legs that still work. Going in and out of the hospital daily I felt like at least my legs are strong compared to many that I see. Maybe I can't talk well, but I can see and think, etc. Life may not be great but at least I'm still here, and things could be worse.

I take anti depressants (SSRI)and would recommend investigating that for either patient or caregiver who finds the stress and anxiety to be constant and interferring with daily life. I was not "depressed" but was anxious/stressed and have found the medication to be very helpful in making me more of an oppomist (started SSRI meds before I had cancer)

michelle