Thank you for all the responses. I have such little time and so much to write and soooo many questions. Gary, you are an incredible person. I have read a lot of your postings and you are so helpful and positive and everything that you say seems to come from your heart. You are a wonderful man!
I just talked to my mom this morning. Her oncologist ordered another PET scan last week. She will get the results today and they will compare it to her last scan. Her last one was in October and it came up clean then in November she discovered the lump on her gum and her ENT was going to send her home "cancer free" when she brought it to his attention they did the biopsy and the cancer was back. She had surgery to remove the tumor in December and they graphed from her leg. He didn't do the chemo and radiation the first time in April just removed 2/3 of her tongue and part of her palate (not sure how to spell that) and lymph nodes on one side no cancer in any of her nodes so he staged her as a stage 1 and now we wonder why since it recurred so quickly. We are wondering what stage she is now because it recurred. I think the PET scan is just to compare with the other scan and make sure it hasn't spread if it hasn't spread is it still a stage 1 as the tumor was not more than a cm and only mm deep and had not gone into the bone? She is 56 and has never smoked or been a heavy drinker. She works for a research lab and thinks she got it from something at work back in the days when they were not very careful with all the drums of chemicals etc..
I have so much to tell and so many questions and I have no time to ask. My mom is already getting sores in her mouth (on her good side) she hasn't started taking anything for the pain yet but I tell her she needs to. This is all so overwelming and scary. Thank you all for your encouraging words and input.

Danielle