Dear Dee,
I can feel your exhaustion and relate....by 1/5 at least. We are a year out and things aren't good. You have had so much strength through this, that I worry for your health. Please try to rest (yeah, right, I know). And try to remember, that for WHATEVER reason, we were chosen to follow this path. If nothing more, to find courage from people like you, and hopefully share it with others.
Please email me, if you need someone to talk to.
Love,
Mandi