Hi,
My husband and I also received two opionions of what should be the course of treatment -- chemo/rad first then possible surgery or surgery first. I agree with Brian that many factors must weigh in the decision. There is no right or wrong answer, just the right one for you.
However, what helped to convince us to go with surgery first is our ENT surgeon said it was better to do surgery first because the tissue would be in much better condidition. I.e, there would be no scarring tissue or damaged tissue related to the radiation and he would be able to see the edges of the tissue better. (I know your docs were saying that there would be no problem operating on a radiated neck, so I guess it's a matter of opinion.)
Also, having gone through this, we personnally are happy we went through the neck dissection first. The rad/chemo treatments were particularly tough and my husband lost a lot of weight. To think he had to go through a radical neck dissection including a treacheotomy AFTER radiation is difficult to imagine. The only other factor is the location. This whole process is tough and time consuming. Depending on family/friends support network, you may want to consider staying closer to home. It is a difficult decision and I hope things work out for you.
BC