i cant tell you guys how much i appreciate your words of wisdom.my dad fears disfigurement really bad.they did an mri this week,but then ordered another mri of the sinus cavity.i guess there's concern that it might possibly have entered the muscle and got into the sinuses.he has this mri done tomorrow.i talked with my dad last night. he said if it was just a tiny peice of tissue that they had to remove,then he will try ot.however,if it involves any disfigurement then no he wont opt for it.i mean,i knew the chances of a cure were pretty much out of the question. i guess deep down inside i just wanted him so badly to beat this ugly monster.our family has a heavy history of cancer, so i guess i'm not really surprised.its just the moments of thinking what he might miss if he isnt here that just overwhelm me.my babies are still young(8,6,and4).i know how rich my life has been because my dad is in it,that i mourn that my children might not have that option.for my dad i think he still very much in denial of this disease.fear and denial may turn out to be a fatal combo for him this time.he says he is just not afraid of death.he will miss us when he goes ,but he's not scared.i dont know how to combat that!thank you all so much for loaning me a shoulder.right now it's really hard to express these feelings to anyone around me.