Sharon,
I have been wondering about how you made out. I guess, probably because of Lynn, I was afraid to ask. There has been several recent studies that support the use of chemo in treatment of head and neck cancer metastases. I will find the articles, from june, and give you more information. I am certain that some of the studies were from Canada.
I just went through this at MSKCC and, as you have learned, metastases from head and neck cancers don't get the doctors jumping up and down to treat them. You may recall, I had one tumor removed from my left lung in may. The 28 nodes removed during the surgery were clean and that left me with a tumor in my right hilar region. My surgeon sent me to the oncologist but until they got together, post-op, they were at odds on treatment options. I am now on chemo for the remaining tumor and, if it responds(it has), surgery may follow. The meeting on the 26th sounds like a necessary next step and hopefully the 3 of you will come to terms. If you don't like the outcome you need to look elsewhere.
Glenn