I've been reading these posts now for about 3 hours debating on whether to write. I am a 27 year-old man with a small lesion on the inside of my cheek. It has just a hint of white (more translucent than anything), feels rough to my tonge, and appears somewhat corrogated. It's been here a week now and it hasn't cleared.

I have a history of smoking and dipping in college and just picked up dipping again recently during finals.

I am somewhat embarrassed to write in this forum b/c I feel so many people here have so much more to deal with. However, my background makes this hard for me to deal with. I spent 3 years in a PhD program studying none other than oral cancer and mentored by an Head and Neck Surgeon.

To be honest I am freaking out right now. I know more than I wish I did about oral cancer and I also have a quasi-phobia of cancer. I keep playing with the spot so much, looking at it in the mirror that I think I might cause the transformation myself.

I have a beautiful 4 month old daughter and I just keep thinking about what if scenarios. I think about the odds that even if this turns out to be treatable with resection what are my odds of never having it again. All of this is so irrational, but I can't help it. I'm not getting anything done.

I just needed to vent with someone other than my wife.