I agree with Brian 100%. Your doctor needs to be more sensitive to the needs of your husband and his family, and at the moment, your husband's most pressing need is to receive accurate information in a timely manner.

Last October, I too had a growth removed from my tongue, along with the attendant biopsy. It took about a week to get the results. My oral surgeon's office left a voice mail saying I should contact the doctor as soon as possible. She then said that if the office was closed by the time I received the message, I should call the doctor on his cell phone at such-and-such number. I knew instantly that the results were not good. (Never in my life have I ever been provided any doctor's personal cell phone number!) I called his cell phone that evening. He very kindly and patiently confirmed my worst fear, but answered all my questions and advised me how to proceed.

My point is that my doctor had the good sense to know that when dealing with oral cancer, time is of the essence. That even if conditions are not ideal for dispensing bad news, it was incumbent upon him to spare me any further anxiety, and to make sure I started down the right treatment path as soon as possible. Your husband has every right to demand no less.

And who knows, maybe the fact that this doctor is willing to wait several days to give you the results is a hopeful sign (even though his "policy" is still unconscionable, in my view). So don't rule out a negative biopsy. But even if the biopsy is positive, you and your husband should still be hopeful. As Brian pointed out, oral cancer is a very treatable and very survivable disease (80%-90% are pretty damned good odds!). For example, my own case was fairly straightforward: an ENT (ear, nose, throat) doctor revisited the biopsy site, and simply removed a much larger area of my tongue. I went to surgery the Monday before Thanksgiving, cooked an entire Thanksgiving meal on Thursday (even though I couldn't eat any of it), and was back at work the following Monday. I continue to see the ENT every 3 months for an examination of my mouth and my neck. So far, so good.

And if you read the stories of others on this board, you will be truly amazed, and even inspired. Even those with very advanced cancers, who have been to hell and back as far as treatments go, continue to go to work, go to the movies, visit the grandkids, take hikes, shoot hoops, make love, play the piano, you name it. So when you're out surfing the web, don't be overwhelmed by the negative. Learn as much as you can, but always remember that there are real human beings behind all the cold statistics and generalizations. You'll find a lot of them right here, and I don't sense that any of them are ready to roll over for this disease.