Hi Paul,
My son was 21 when he was diagnosed. He's 22 now. His experience was a lot like yours. His family doctor did not want to believe it was cancer because of his young age and lack of risk factors. It took three trips to his office and about six weeks before he realized what my son was dealing with.
Things are different for young people with this disease. You have the possibility of a very long life ahead of you and your doctors will need to keep that in mind as they plan your treatment. Because of that, you really should go to a big cancer care center like Dana Farber, where they have probably treated more patients close to your age.
As for things you should do to prepare ... Eat! You will probably have a period after surgery where eating solid food isn't possible so it's a good idea to get some extra calories in while you can.
Always take someone with you to doctor appointments. Hearing a bunch of new stuff at once can get confusing.
Take advantage of any financial or other assistance you can get. Check with your local cancer services office and at the hospital. Having an infant is expensive -- so is cancer.
Speaking of assistance, let your parents help you too. Just because you are married and a father yourself doesn't mean they should no longer be there for you. Just think what you would do for that tiny son of yours ;^)
My son is surviving. Like you, he had a tumor on his tongue. He had that removed and had a neck dissection to check his lymph nodes for cancer in June. (The nodes were negative, yay!) I won't tell you it was easy, because it wasn't. There was some pain involved and learning to eat and talk with a kind of patched together tongue was not fun.
He had additional surgery a month ago, just to move things around in there to make his swallowing and talking even better. Again - not fun, but he thinks the results are worth it.
And we're all (him, me, his dad, his sister, his fiance, the doctors, family, friends) very, very hopeful for the future.
Best of luck to you,
darcy (Matt's Mom)
