Hi Zoe,

My husband was diagnosed mid May and radiation and chemo started yesterday. This forum (the information and the people) has been a blessing for me.

What I found is that my husband was so in shock over the diagnosis, he was of no use during the many, many pre-treatment oncology consultations. He was present, but wasn't really in the moment.

And, we had some anger issues to deal with in that he was mad at the cancer and the situation...and, sometimes at me. Fortunately, that part has gotten better, but from the docs and this forum, I understand that the medications, pain and frustration may impact his mood and I feel braced for that.

I made it through the first hurdle, which was getting him into treatment. I feel ready to help him through the rest of the hurdles because I am a faithful reader of this site. Although, like you, I was scared and unsure of my abilities in the beginning.

The information on here is overwhelming and sometimes scary, but it is informative. Try not to get lost in the scary stuff.

This is one hell of a cancer, focus on learning what you need to help your husband through this. Vent or share your fears here, because this is the place to do it.

When you are meeting with doctors' take notes...lots of them. Ask questions when you are confused. And, come here whenever things don't make sense.

There are some pretty smart people here and so much willingness among people to help each other out.

Through people here, I got a much better understanding of what to expect during the 7 weeks of treatment and beyond. Our doctors, to some extent, have sugar coated much of the information and I just wanted to know the best and worst of the treatment process so that I am well equipped to help my husband through this.

My husband had no symptoms other than a swollen lymph node. So, like your situation, the "C" word came as a shocker.

There was a point in time, I wondered if I could manage him, my kids and my business. But, I have broken it down into smaller segments...day by day.

Please keep us updated on how you and your husband are doing.

We'll keep you in our prayers,

Margaret