Hi everyone,

First, I want to say "Thank you!" for the existence of this site and the great content you've all contributed. Tonight's reading was the "Things I wish I had known" category - and all of that has been tremendously helpful.

Thank you, also, to the wonderful people who replied to my first posts and helped me know they've been there before me and that this is doable.

I was diagnosed with a 3 cm tumor at the base of my tongue, together with 3 infected lymph nodes on the left side of my neck. The total diagnosis took a few weeks to complete, as tests provided new data, but I count last December 29 as "the day" I learned, as that was when my doctor gave me the results of the biopsy. (Why do doctors always close the door before they say anything? Don't they know this is a dead giveaway that they're about to tell you something awful? )

He referred me to Stanford's Cancer Center; I attended the Head & Neck tumor board there on January 4. From what I can tell they seem to be pretty good medically. The different groups don't seem to coordinate well, though, and the doctor's seem more focussed on solving specific problems rather than treating the whole person. They also could use some sensitivity training in the administrative groups. The nursing staff is extraordinarily knowledgable, supportive and routinely seem to work beyond the call of duty.

I'm starting treatment next Thursday (Feb 8). I'll be receiving six weeks of IMRT (30 sessions total) in parallel with 3 chemo treatments of cisplatin, each of which will be separated by 3 weeks. (The tumor board decided surgery should be a last option, given the placement of the tumor at the base of my tongue.)

Thanks to comments here and elsewhere, I've had my teeth cleaned and checked, my hearing tested and some minor health issues cleared up.

Yesterday was mask making day. Not the most enjoyable experience (being strapped to a table, immobile and with green mesh molded onto my face never figured in my list of things to do) but the alternative is much worse. (What sadist designed hospital gowns?)

So, thanks to my wonderful support network, medical staff, supportive local library and, most importantly, the experience and encouragement of all of you here, I think I'm as ready as I'm going to be. Scared to death, but ready.

I don't know any of you, but you're very important to me. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for taking the time to contribute to this site and making things that much more bearable for those of following you.