hugs to you. i commented on your other post since I live in Iowa as well and have been down some of this path twice now.
One day at a time. it's the best you can do right now. sometimes hour by hour. it's ok. you will get through if you break it down.
Spouse of 58 yr old with BOT cancer
Stage 4a HPV16 positive
3 chemo treatments cisplantin
35 radiation treatments 7000 cGy
former smoker/chewed tobacco for 38 yrs.
1/2020 diagnosed with cancer near TMJ
4/2020 chemo 5 days every 2 weeks
6/2020 proton therapy
9/21/2020 cancer free