Thank you Christine! When we're with the doctor who told him he needs 3,000 cals for healing, he blanched and said he only needs 1500, what he was doing before he got sick/started treatment. Dr explained that his body needs so much more for healing! He said he can't get that much in his stomach in one day! Dr said he'd be happy with 2,000 cals then, ok? Agreed.

But. Get home and only wants his regular protein shakes he drank before working out. The tube feed is too heavy and makes him sick. Try telling him he needs to take the reglan meds half hour before feeding. He just HATES having to access the tube and sit there while I pour stuff in! Only wants to do it couple times a day. And just wants me to put everything in at the same time and hurry up, instead of spreading it out.

Today he says he doesn't think he'll ever get better. I reminded him about the 3,000 cals needed. But he says he can't . I said let's try another formula. But he says he's sick of being a Guinea pig. He thinks he can just hold on with taking his protein drinks until he can start to swallow again. But complains that he can't swallow, it hurts too much. Dr is really worried about him not regaining the ability to swallow again and being a high aspiration risk.

Asks my opinion about what to take, but then says he doesn't want that.

Worst part now is that my job is pushing for me to get back home and get back to work in next 2 weeks since my area is going Green. No reason to work from home anymore. He will have to come with me. And that will be a real joy! 5 to 6 hour drive. He will have to do the stairs for the bathroom, which is a change. Plus I will be gone all day most days. So less feedings!

I just don't know.