Sometimes I drink that shake if I know I've not eaten enough. At the moment, an average daily menu is a homemade smoothie for breakfast (between 550 - 600 calories), lunch is a home made soup plus an ice cream or 3 chocolates from a box and a cup of tea, dinner is a canned soup, a yoghurt, some jelly (jello) made with ensure. I might have a snack of some more ice cream with chocolate or raspberry syrup, or some biscuits with a cup of tea.

My husband gets me to try some of his dinner. Last night I tried some lamb sheek kebab (minced lamb and mint of a stick). That was good, but I needed mint yoghurt to help it down. At the weekend we're going to have a little buffet. I have dips (hummus, sour cream and chive, aubergine dip, guacomole) and some nibbly bits like sausage roll, cherry tomatoes, mini corndogs, fresh peppers, thick cut chips (fries), rice crisps (chips) etc, just to let me try different things. I'll have lots of water with me. If I can't eat it, then my husband will have a great meal for a couple of days. I always have some Ensure in the fridge as back up, it's especially helpful if I'm too tired to eat.

I haven't used my feeding tube in 8 weeks. I flush it every day with water and that's it. I can't wait to get it removed.

At the moment they're testing me for Addison's Disease, which is where the body stops producing cortisol and other hormones. It causes a drop in BP, nausea, fainting, lack of appetite and some other bits. Fingers crossed its all temporary though.

I was on a an immunotherapy trial.I had 2 doses before surgery to see if it would shrink my tumour, and then I was supposed to have 15 doses post surgery, over 12 months, to work as a preventative against it all coming back. I got sick and the trial was stopped at dose 10 when they realised it was the immunotherapy causing me to be unwell. As I'm not getting better without steroids, my team have decided to stop the drug.