Hello again!

Reading your responses has been a great help to me these past couple of weeks. I wish there wasn’t a need for this forum but now that there is I’m happy I found my way here. I still cry a lot and I’m still scared but it’s getting better. My friends have helped me get in contact with a guy that went through (almost) the same thing a few years ago and talking to him has also helped me a lot.

Right now I’m recovering from the neck dissection and second partial glossectomy and soon I’ll start 6 weeks of radiation. Hopefully I’ll get through everything with enough energy so I can start getting my life back together.

I’m trying not to let this beat me and I can control most of the “what ifs” but I must admit the “what if it comes back” is a pretty hard one to ignore. But I’m trying my best. Trying to take your advice and take everything one day at a time. Keeping busy with the little energy I have and reading your stories about how you’re living fulfilling lives after all that you’ve been through keeps me going and gives me hope.

Hopefully, in a few years, I'll get to a point were I'm strong and stable enough to help someone else in this forum just like you all have helped me.

Daun: I really hope your biopsy results show absolutely no sign of cancer and that you never have to log on to this forum again. I completely understand what you mean about dealing with the guilt of being a smoker. I was a smoker myself and I keep having flashbacks of moments I’ve smoked and I just feel so stupid. Now, the doctors say it probably wasn’t my smoking habits that got me into this mess (I have a skin condition that increases the risk of getting oral cancer) but I’m sure all those cigarettes didn’t help. Anyway, keep working hard on quitting. My dad finally quit after 10 tries and 20 years. If he can do it, so can you. Just don’t give up.