By the way, Wendy, I totally agree that you should get a second and even a third opinion. I went for 3 consultations and am so glad I did as each differed markedly in how they would perform reconstruction surgery. I ended up going with the third opinion and it was a very good decision.
Esther

Squamous cell carcinoma of tongue (never smoked and not HPV related) stage 4 diagnosed 8-2016; #6 trach, partial glossectomy, reconstruction. neck dissection 9-2016. 3 nodes out of 25 removed were positive for cancer--refused radiation & chemo; monitored via quarterly MRIs.