We do things similar. I know appearance helps in many areas, besides just cancer. One of my oncologists told me once to get/keep in shape, being I had so many recurrences, she said, so I won't be refused treatment, and also help in my recovery. I do write out questions for myself to ask, its just I don't usually show it, and rehearse them at home, and then again in the waiting room before I see the doctor, think of plans/answers A, B, & C, and keep the list on my person, and even look at in the exam room when the nurse leaves. I also have a written timeline, similar to our signature, including who else I saw since my last visit, and my current prescriptions and highlight ones I need. Which I do keep in hand, including current blood work that may have been ordered by another doctor.

I like doctors that have residents, physician assistants or nurse practitioners. I tell them more than the doctor, being their time is more limited, and let their assistant decide what is important to say to them. Often they bring up items for discussion or the doctor knows to keys in one of the areas I mentioned, if not, I bring up important matters myself.

It's a lot of work just to stay healthy, and on on top of any issues, and have lots of experience, unfortunately, with 9 different hospitals, including 12 current specialists, and just finished my last dr appointment today, at a new CCC, where my doctor was recruited, totaling for the year with 95 doctor visits, 1 hospital stay, 1 surgery, 3 procedures, 3 scans,12 blood tests, 2 swallow Studies, 20 SLP, 2 EMG/nerve study, and 10 physical therapy, and it was a quiet year lol.

Good luck formalizing your support group, and hope this helps.