Welcome GK. Firstly one of the good things about this place is there is usually someone online somewhere in the world. Its before dawn in the states but you have your trusty Aussies and Kiwis ready for duty.
The initial diagnosis is a very stressful time. Your lives have just undergone a massive shift. It feels like life as you know it has ended, and it has. But its not over.
The first step is to understand whats happening next. Don't think too far ahead and don't try to paint ahead further than you can see. Understand the next appointment, what its for, what questions you want to ask. Have a clear understanding of how the radiation is going to work, and what you're going to have to do to get ready for it. For me it was to quit smoking and pull 3 teeth. Neither was pleasant.
I went on sleeping tablets pretty quickly. What they are good for is putting you to sleep at particular times. Rather than be up tossing and turning you can at least get to sleep before an early appointment in the morning. They're addictive and not without their issues, but working with the doctor I found them helpful.
Counselling is good to a point, but two things about that. Go easy on yourselves. Give yourself time to get used to the changes. You're not suddenly psycho, it is perfectly normal to go through the emotions you're going through. Also generic counsellors can only help you so far. You need to talk to people who have a sound understanding of cancers, in particular your type of cancer and treatment.
Keep yourself busy doing practical things before your treatment. Go to the dentist, visit family, eat well, service the car, tidy up your will, mow the lawn. Everyday practical things you'll struggle to do during treatment. Keeping the mind and body busy is good for both and relieves stress.
Its never easy to face your own mortality. Its not a fixed thing, not for any of us. Don't focus on the day you will die, you don't know when it is, two years is a doctor's guess. Focus on the things you can do, the things you need to get through. Break it down into whats happening this week, whats happening today. What do I need to do, where do I need to be and what do I need to bring.
As for staying positive, I hated the "P" word. It was so overused, but its very true. I had a mantra for my wife and my family, "keep your chin up, because its contagious when it drops". You don't just stay positive for yourself, you smile through it for the people who love you and who will carry you through it. I think you've already got one of those, she's doing the typing.
