Hi Iris. Welcome to the OCF forum. A place that will help both you and your husband through your journey. Sounds as if you have one of those stubborn husbands that need a kick in the pants- and your gonna need to be tough on him. First of all- this disease does not only affect him- it affects you,your children and all that love and care for all of you! He needs to understand this and the importance of a second opinion with a Comprehensive Cancer Center. You mention he had one but won't share details? I suggest you research a CCC and make an appt for him. Go on line and look to see if they have a "multidisciplinary Head & Neck Team". Make the appt- and tell him this is for you and children and if he cares about you - he will go WITH you.the right kind of second opinion is vital. My husband was given a stage IV diagnosis too. Today we learned his one year post treatment scans are clear! He was a stubborn patient with me too...but we both survived. : ) Tough love... Keep us posted.