Carl,
Your diagnosis is very similar to mine, which occurred 3 years ago. My tumor was also at base of tongue on the epiglottis with neck nodes and I had similar treatment to your own, and also had a feeding tube. What you are about to go through is not easy...in fact it is a long hard road (and I did not have sick parents to deal with as well).
The good news is that three years later I look and feel normal and live a wonderful life. Sure, I have the constant dry mouth and I can't eat like I used to...but other than that, I can work, play golf,travel, enjoy (or not enjoy) my children, etc. Three summers ago I would not have believed that life could be this good again...so keep the faith, and, best wishes for your family as well.

Danny G.