Hi Nina, my husband also had a total Glossectomy ( plus other surgery ).
Kris spent 4 weeks in the hospital so I'm kinda surprised that yours is home already. Kris was pretty drained for a good 6-8 weeks after coming home. It takes time to recover, but you should see improvements week by week. Actually it took Kris more than a year to get back to near normal.
Does your husband have a permanent trachy? Kris also has a trachy, his is permanent as he also had a laryngectomy. Kris did have a lot of tracheal secretions and we managed these by investing in a nebuliser. He initially nebulised saline at least 4 times a day. This helps to loosen the mucous so that it can easily be coughed up. The oral secretions Kris managed with frequent mouth washes and cleaning with the green " sponge on sticks". Of course having no functioning tongue makes it impossible to swallow secretions in the mouth. Kris just wipes it out with a handkerchief or tissue
. You may find that your house is quite dry, it being winter where you are, and you may need a humidifier to add moisture to the air. A dry atmosphere will dry out secretions and make them hard to cough out.
Like Christine, I hope you have some family nearby who can help you, especially with the children. Or even just to be with your husband while you and the kids get out.
It will get better Nina.
Tammy