Hi Teresa,
Welcome but sorry you had to find us.
The pain from the surgery will eventually lessen. Anything they do concerning the tongue hurts like heck! While I didn't have tongue surgery, they took lots of chunks for biopsies and they hurt for ages! Make sure you take the pain meds as scheduled. It's easier to prevent pain than to make it go away.
Okay... I hear you. I absolutely do but despite the fear and apprehension, despite the feelings of depression and sadness, you have to buck up and get through this not only for yourself but for your kids.
I assure you, you'll get through this! They have to do the rads to make sure they got everything. All it takes is one microscopic cancer minion to start it all over again. You didn't mention chemo (surprised) but you'll still have some side effects (neck burn, fatigue, sore throat and mouth etc). Start prepping your neck now with a skin treatment such as "Special Care Cream".
I also assure you that eventually, you'll feel much better. With help from a Speech/Language Pathologist and therapy your speech will return to normal and you'll be eating the things you enjoy.
I'm not gonna sugar coat it, treatment is brutal but you'll make it through!
This is a great site for information and encouragement. We've been there and done it, some more than once. Do your very best to stay hydrated and nourished. Others will chime in with specifics.
Hang in there and hang on. It'll all be over before you know it!
Positive thoughts and prayers.
"T"