Hi Caco,
I understand the frustration...having lived a portion of it during our situation. I tried "patient and polite". But, got more mileage out of "bitc...I mean...caregiver from hell". Or as Gary says..."proactive advocate". Between doctors' egos and more than a few staffers with a lack of work ethic, there were eff-ups a plenty. And, I went proactive all over their butt. More than one doctor got a bolus of proactivity.

You don't have to go to that extreme. But, sometimes, the ineptitude and abject stupidity of some of folks (doctors are NOT exempt)can push a patient's advocate over the edge. I decided to make the best of it and greatly enjoyed helping a few who were particularly in need of having their cranium resected from their colon.

We were going through it at exactly this time last year. And, even people who are professional and/or who work in the medical field can get really stupid and selfish during the holidays. But, push away. When you aren't getting treated with consideration and expediency, don't be afraid to say words that will curdle egg nog. After all, they have a job that requires them to actually work during November, December and January. They should be expected to do a competent job despite the days they are closed for celebrating. Some things can't and shouldn't be put off for later. It might not be life or death for them...but it is for you and someone you love.

Escalate to a person of higher authority (you can stop short of God, though) to get some action. When the person in charge of scheduling repeatedly dropped the ball in scheduling J's tests, I spoke with her employer--the doctor. I made sure he knew that I understood that staff members who make mistakes not only cause critical delays in treatment but are also a threat to the health of his business. He appreciated the feedback and took some of my suggestions with him into the next staff meeting.

Be a nice enough advocate to make the hired help want to help you. But, be enough of a harpy to make them want to do their best work to avoid your rath (if not your phone calls) at all costs. It worked for me!