Hi Gerri, it is really important to get the pain controlled, as cancer pain is unlike any other. I know what you feel that he won't get hospice etc, but speak with social services via the hospital where his oncologist is based. They should be able to help you get some cae in the home. If they can't help, you need to ask his/your GP for help. I tried on my own for 18 months, then ended up getting palliative care come to the house. That care stopped when my husband unexpectedly went into remission. Not complaining about that, they have told me I can call them when ever I want. Thing is, I had other people help me, and they used to tell him how I might be too. He didn't think about me then. We still have times that he doesn't think about me, but is more aware at how I am effected by our situation. I still struggle sometimes, 2 years later, and this site is my salvation, although I'm not on it every day. I am inspired by people on this site who have had to go through as a patient on there own, no caregiver, nothing. Ask for help. There are only 2 answers you can get - yes or no. Stay silent, no one can help. Lot's of love to you...Jeanna xxxx