Dave, sorry you're going through this and indeed very sorry to hear about your wife. It just doesn't seem fair sometimes.

You're doing the right thing getting the lump checked out by an ENT. I second Minnie's advice to get it biopsied. Hard to imagine that the ENT wouldn't agree, although of course I'm not a doctor. But it seems to me that the biopsy is the only way to be sure, and it will at least give you peace of mind.

As far as going through it on your own. If you DO have to go through anything, you'll make it. I did a year of cancer treatments on my own. You find the resources. It's a plus if you have a good team, both medically and emotionally. You also have all of us here.

Keep us posted, and courage!
David2

David 2
SCC of occult origin 1/09 (age 55)| Stage III TXN1M0 | HPV 16+, non-smoker, moderate drinker | Modified radical neck dissection 3/09 | 31 days IMRT finished 6/09 | Hit 14 years all clear in 6/23 | Radiation Fibrosis Syndrome kicked in a few years after treatment and has been progressing since | Prostate cancer diagnosis 10/18